We are Gods hands.

15.10.2009 Los Angeles

Dear Emmi,

Your pictures were lovely! I like the one that I think is a view from your home window. The rainy weather is not something I miss, but it surely looks beautiful on pictures.

Like I said I wanted to share some pictures from the beach by Santa Monica Pier. Please click on the picture below to read the text.

190 miles. Step for each life lost.

They had lists of the American soldiers killed. Names, dates and the cause of deaths. I looked up my birthday.
5th of November. Last year I had a party at Hoxton Square, London at Blu Bar. Everyone came. I wore the highest purple shoes. Stayed up until 9am drinking whiskey.
Sergeant Carlos M Camacho-Rivera. 5th of November in 2004 was he's last day. He was 24. 11th transport battalion. Hostile fire, rocket attack.
I looked at he's name on the paper among hundreds of other names and cried. He had a son I found out after googling his name. People were writing to him:

"CAMACHO, WOW i cant believe its been two years on the 5th of Nov on that day it all happened. I know you were my angel that day, and i know your in heaven waching over me. I WILL NEVER FORGET. May God Bless You, You were truely my angel on that day..."

Made me think what he did. Did he save this man?

They had a book where people wrote little messages. Prayers for loved ones, pleading for peace, thanking the soldiers.

" We are God's hands", I wrote.

Everyday 18 U.S veterans commit suicide.

1 in every 3 women in the U.S military is sexually assaulted.

1 in every 4 homeless people in America is a U.S veteran.

It is heavy and hard. And the soldiers say: "We want to go. This is an honor."
And I was thinking: if they KNEW what was going to happen. If Carlos Camacho-Rivera would have known he was going to die, would he have wanted to go anyway?

With Love,

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