Usually but not today

Helsingissä 18. tammikuuta 2011

Dear Kirsikka,

Usually it hits me right about this time of the year. It makes me anxious, nervous and blue. I start to think if I have any reason to stay. I wonder if grass would be any greener on the other side. And it WOULD, you know how awful it can get. So dark, so grey.

--Burning bridges shore to shore
I break away from something more--

So usually I've wanted to get out of Finland at least semi permanently. I crave sunshine and warmth and to be as far away from my routines here as possible.

I say "usually" because this winter hasn't given me the creeps. Not even when I look at these pictures from last summer. (I'm sorry I don't have anything new with Diana yet. So I need to bring the Spinner 360° back! Remember to click to enlarge!)

Actually this autumn was one the best of my life. And when things are really good, I don't really need to be anywhere else. When you're happy you enjoy even the coldest of weathers. It is really crazy to realize because I've hated winter for a long time. (Not when I was a child because you get to wear that super warm saving uniform called "haalari". God I miss that.)

I've learnt that you really shouldn't cling on the past nor dream of the future but to focus on NOW. I'm learning to do that.

--Tick, tick, tick, tick on the watch
And life's too short for me to stop--

But it doesn't mean that you shouldn't enjoy the greatest of memories through pictures like these or a song or a scent that reminds you of something extraordinary. I love love love your last photos. They are so beautiful and make me think on Total Eclipse. You know what I'm talking about.

As a matter of fact I think I'm going to reminisce about autumn 2010. Just like I'm looking at these photos now. I didn't know it then tho. Actually I was a bit sad at the moment. But that moment was a beginning of something far more better than the past.

--This time I'll be bulletproof--

With Love,

Emmi and the Spinner

quote: Bulletproof - La Roux


Happy New Year!

Jan 7th 2011, London
Dear Emmi,

Hahaa, thank you for the most amazing christmas calendar! I think my favorites were the christmas spices and maybe my own matches that you stuffed in the envelope number 14, haha. You did confess that you ran out of things, but it still made me laugh!

As you know I opened several of them beforethe right date but I'm sure that's no surprise to anyone.

Face of a friend.

These pictures are from the park next to my house. You were with me. The first four are my favorite pictures in awhile.

I gave these pictures to someone. All of my favorite ones. He will put them in his home. As big prints. Im pretty excited as theres something about these that I really like. And something about him I really like too. So works out well.

I've always liked dark comedy. The contradiction of laughter and tragedy is interesting to me. Same thing with images that are dark and bare, but beautiful. You know what I mean? That's why I like this one. And the film La Vita è Bella. It's amazing that you can be watching a story of one the biggest, most heart braking tragedies and inhumane crimes in the history and laugh. I mean whilst also crying your eyes out at the same time but still.

It's like you know how they make porn films out of everything? Like " Muffy The Vampire Layer" or " Pirates" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-5oBFHeilY&feature=related it's actually pretty entertaining) I'm not sure if they could make a porn film of something like "The Ring" and actually make it SUPER scary at the same time. (hahah, The Ring... I'm sure they already made one, but I doubt it will be terrifying)

This is the last one. The person who got this does not know it but this could be a self portrait. Can you see my shoes on the edge of the water? It's be awesome to call it a serious self portrait and say that the reflection is me but I would never say " oh yeah I'm a swan". I am so not a swan. And it sounds really pretentious to call your self a swan. Or a butterfly or stuff like that. "Oh yeah I was ugly but now I'm so amazing". Get real.

And also, I'm sorry- I was never ugly.

I was just looking at this and thought that swans legs look pretty funny. You don't really see them when they swim. And they have a pretty impressive waddle. Can you imagine if it lost one leg and would hop around and swim in circles. Seriously however if it happened in this park it really wouldn't matter because people pour so much bread down this birds throats all it would have to do is open it's mouth and get fatter. Even if they took both of the legs it could just float around and be fed.

(Where does the one legged girl work?
-At Ihop )

Seriously btw how do they find south when they leave for winter? It makes no sense. I can't even read my Iphone map. I mean it. I really can't. And I went to girl scouts.

You know that song "Promise" by Tracy Chapman?

It makes me cry.

With love,
Kirsikka and Diana Mini